Why did I choose to title this post as Strada? Probably because this eye shadow on my desk is called Strada. Yeah, I'm not feeling too creative today.
I hate when people fight. I hate when I get into arguments with people and it just ends awkwardly. Sadly, this is happening to me alot lately. I try to fix things and stay calm and be a person who's 'go with the flow' but I can't do that. It took me 21 years to realize that I can't and won't change for anyone. I wish relationships were easier. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who cares about what's going on. Lately I've felt like I've been giving alot (not just in my relationship but everywhere) and not getting much back. That feeling is the worst because its so discouraging and it makes you second guess yourself. Should I keep doing what I'm doing and keep waiting OR should I move on and let my inner bitch shine? Obviously, if I were to bring out my inner bitch I'd have no friends lol. Forealz though, sometimes I have those days where I think my life is spinning out of control. Its like being lost without a map. Its a confusing time for alot of us because we're graduating, wondering how we're gonna pay OSAP back and hoping we find jobs but apart from those stressors, I feel like I don't have my support system anymore. I feel disconnected and as if a part is missing from me. Its a scary feeling but I think I need to step back and re-evaluate what I have and what's important to me.
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